Morphy The Corpse Flower: The Experience

Photo courtesy of Sean Hurley, New Hampshire Public Radio

People used to ask me why I came to Dartmouth. I was always too nervous to tell them the truth, so I lied.  I said everything but the one, the big — the biggest — reason. You see, Dartmouth has the biggest flower in the world.  Let me say that again, of the God knows how many flowers in the world, Dartmouth. Has. The. Biggest. One. Its name is Morphy, and it is a corpse flower, scientific name Amorphophallus titanum (from Ancient Greek amorphos, “without form, misshapen” +phallos, “phallus“, and titan, “giant”). In case you missed that, its scientific name literally means “giant misshapen phallus.” You can’t make this stuff up.

It’s on livestream, so if you don’t feel like walking over to the greenhouse and staring at it in all of its glory, just check it out here.

Here is what it was like for me to realize the goal of my life after visiting Morphy at the Dartmouth College Greenhouse. Continue reading

How to Decorate Your Room (for Free!)

Miss out on the poster sale in FoCo last week? Were you at the career fair instead? Well besides needing to get your priorities straight, you’ve got a bigger issue. You are just starting to notice how bare the walls of your room are as you look up from your computer at 8:50pm Sunday night and wonder why the recruiting deadline couldn’t be midnight instead of nine. But that’s beside the point.

What matters now is how you’re going to decorate. And because you’re still looking for a job, you have to decorate on a budget. Ideally for free. Well, here’s the list that will help you do just that.

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Things You Would Rather Do Than Rush


“OH MY GOSH! I luuuuuv your shoes! Becky — get over here! Don’t you just luuuuuv her shoes?”
“OH MY GOSH! I do! I really love her shoes!”
“Isn’t she just, like the cutest little thing?!”
“She like totally is just the cutest little thing!”
“Gamma Beta Sigma Lambda Phi Psi Epsilon Delta Chi just like totally needs you to be a part of the…SISTERHOOD!!!!”

Usually that’s the part where I wake up screaming from the nightmare, realizing that, one, I don’t actually know anyone named Becky and two, Dartmouth rush seems blessedly civilized compared to what you usually think of when you hear the word “sarawrity” (see University of Alabama’s Alpha Phi recruitment video from last year).

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Guys on Womens’ Rush at Dartmouth

It’s that time of year again… womens’ rush.  Over the next week women will be running all over campus making small talk, smiling until their mouths hurt and collecting names in booklets like they’re Pokémon.  Yet, men’s rush lasts two days and seems to mostly involve playing pong and shaking hands.  So, what exactly do guys think happens at womens’ rush events?