Life at Dartmouth can be hard, what with the harsh winters, D-Plan and limited social scene working against you. “Dear Lone Pining,” Dartbeat’s premier student advice column, is here to help! Anonymously submit your questions here and our lifestyle expert, Lone Pining, will help tackle your problems. Here’s what Lone Pining had to say this week:
Snow: It’s basically May, yet we find ourselves digging our long-lost Bean Boots out of the closet.
Snapchat stories of the snow: Common captions include: “Wtf, Hanover,” “Wait, what,” “No, thanks” and “Grim.”
Novack hecklers: Strategy for passing through Novack these days: avoid all eye contact, pretend to be late for something and look as unapproachable as possible.
Panicking ’16s: With less than 50 days left until graduation, fill up on Foco cookies while you can, ’16s.
Matzah balls: Happy Passover, Dartmouth!
Student on FFB: “Do they make Band-Aids for dogs?”
’17: “I just lifted up my shirt to look at my boobs.”
’19: “I had to listen to a Prince song in class today, so I guess my day’s not going that well either.”
’17: “I hate the male race.”
It was a long time coming, but spring has finally sprung. This past week, there was an exponential increase in the number of people hanging out on the Green. And that got me thinking: How can I capture spring term at Dartmouth in graphs? I may not have known how to graph Canada’s production possibility frontier on my last Econ midterm, but I think I figured out how to map these more relevant trends (sorry, Canada):