A Tale of Two DBAs

Courtesy of Lionsgate / via mtv.com

It is the best of times worst of times. As week nine rolls around, I think we can all agree that things are grim at best. As I write this post in the periodicals on a Saturday night, I’m realizing that there are way too many people in here with me, which is indicative of a few things: 1) Finals are coming, 2) I’m not the only one who hasn’t started that huge final paper due next week and 3) We are all screwed. Misery likes company, right?

Few things suck worse than pulling all-nighters (and subsequently sleeping through a final exam), but breaking even on DBA takes the cake. There are two kinds of people at Dartmouth — the people who end the term with negative DBA, and the people who leave with hundreds of dollars still left over. Come week ten, it’s nearly impossible to have hit that DBA sweet spot.

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Dartmouth in Graphs

Dartmouth X

When someone says “graphs,” the first thing that comes to mind is probably plotting lab results and analyzing Econ trends for class. Let’s be honest, the only graph at Dartmouth that actually relates to your own life is the Dartmouth X. But there are so many other important aspects of Dartmouth culture that deserve to be plotted, and fortunately, Dartbeat has come up with a few graphs of our own:

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Hello (From the Light Side)

hello

A ballad from a NARP to their non-NARP significant other to the tune of Adele’s “Hello.” (Note that I don’t actually have an athlete boyfriend.) (Allow me the delusion, please.)

Hello, it’s me
I was wondering if after all these weeks you’d like to eat
And go over everything
They say that Foco’s good for facetime
But yours I’m barely seeing

Hello, can you hear me
I’m in the omelet line just dreamin’ about who we used to be
When you weren’t in season, so free
I’ve forgotten how it felt to date a DP2 athlete
There’s such a difference between us
And a million miles

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Foco Superfoods

chia seeds

Foco has and always will be a Dartmouth dining enigma. Every time I walk out of Foco, I somehow leave more confused than I was walking in: Why is the froyo machine still broken? What exactly is in the vegan pizza? But the strangest of Foco offerings—the Foco “superfoods”—go largely unnoticed by most meal-swiping students (Hey, 19s!). Most believe that these superfoods, located right above the salad dressings, have amazing nutritional benefits. But how do they taste? This week, Dartbeat took to the test to find out:

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