DIY Beauty: Dartmouth Dining Services Edition


Picture this: It is a fine Tuesday evening. You have just returned from a two-hour workout at the gym. You feast your eyes on a delightful quinoa spinach tofu salad from Collis and a steaming cup of antioxidant-packed tea. While snacking on your holistic protein supplement, however, you suddenly realize that you accidentally finished all your homework the night before. The horror! In a tizzy you look around your room: Your laundry is done, your bed is made, your shelves have been de-cluttered. A single tear rolls down your cheek. You feel lost and devoid of purpose.

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Attention 19s: 8 Dining Hall Rules No One Told You

If you’re a ’19, you’re probably already aware that upperclassmen love poking fun at you for not picking up on things that are just part of the Dartmouth culture. As you adapt to life here, your days will become less rife with opportunity to embarrass yourself, we promise. But lucky for you, Dartbeat is here to speed up that process. Here are eight dining hall rules (applicable in FoCo and a sprinkling of other places that offer satiation) you need to get down.  Continue reading

FoCo Joe: Banana Boats

14F is already underway, and with a new season comes a new flavor profile for all types of foods.  The pumpkin spice latte is back, apples are very much in season and home-cooked comfort foods are making a comeback.  Though we can very much see that 14X is long gone, I still refuse to accept that fall has truly begun. This week’s dessert is an homage to the straddling between seasons — it can be made at any time of the year and taste great.  I call it a “banana boat,” inspired by an entirely different dessert from my study abroad experience in Buenos Aires, Argentina over 14S — the fall season in the Southern Hemisphere.

Toward the end of my time on the Spanish language study abroad in Buenos Aires, one of the host families invited all nine of us on the program to their home for an afternoon barbecue of sorts, what is known in Argentina as an “asado,” or grill. It is a huge ordeal requiring considerable effort and meant for bigger crowds, as nearly every part of the cow is cooked and consumed. The host family made a delicious dessert involving grilled bananas, dulce de leche (like caramel, but better), and rum.  They cut open the bananas, still in their peels, filled them with dulce de leche and then drizzled rum on top. The real kicker — they used a handheld blowtorch to better incorporate the rum and dulce de leche into the gooey bananas.  The process was a spectacle in itself.  And let me tell you, it was so, so good.

FoCo of course does not have rum at hand, nor does it have dulce de leche (sadly). Nonetheless, these “banana boats” will certainly intrigue even the most curious of culinary explorers.

Step 1: Grab a banana from the fruits and cut it open length-wise.  There should be just one slice down the middle of the banana, with the peel still on.  Make the cut deep enough so that the true goodies will have room to cohabitate (see Step 2).

Step 2: Head over to the cookies and find the warmest, gooiest ones on the table.  One cookie should do, but of course room can always be made for two.  Mash them up and insert into the boats.

Step 3: By the soft-serve machine, drizzle some warm caramel sauce over the boats. The boats should not be sinking in caramel, but there should be enough caramel to complement the banana.

Step 4: If you’re feeling fancy, add some rainbow or chocolate sprinkles on top for appearance’s sake. Everything looks better with sprinkles, no?

Step 4: Enjoy!  Grab a spoon and scoop out spoonfuls to your liking.  Make sure to eat this dessert while the caramel and cookie are still hot. This dessert is so easy to share with friends too!



The Unfailing Guide to Finding a Table at Collis

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Sometimes you want eggs just badly enough that you’re willing to risk life and limb to find a table at Collis. We’ve all been there: the nervous glances scanning the room, the sinking feeling when you think you’ve spotted a table but someone’s coat is hanging just out of sight on one of the plastic chairs, the awkward walk/jog when trying to beat someone to the last patio table. How does one go about finding a spot amidst the madness? Here’s a flowchart that might help you out.

Appetizing April: A DDS Food Face-Off, The Winner


And the winner of the 2014 DDS Food Face-off is…


Is anyone genuinely surprised by this result? The gooey, chocolate-y deliciousness that is this cookie has always been there for me when I need a sugar fix or as the final course in an extended FoCo dinner. We all need comfort food while at college, and this certainly does the trick for those of us with a major sweet tooth (an affliction my entire family struggles with). While some prefer crispier chocolate chip cookies making FoCo’s version not to their taste, it can be hard to resist melted chocolate (or cheese for that matter – see our runner-up).


The cookies were a strong contender from the start and no doubt the favorite. Despite this, the Brie and Apple sandwich put up a strong fight and in the final showdown maintained 39% of the votes.

Help me celebrate the cookie’s victory by indulging in one (or seven) this week!

Appetizing April: A DDS Food Face-Off, Round 5

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The day is finally upon us — the final round of Appetizing April! It is time to pick the ultimate food item offered by Dartmouth Dining Services.

Last week’s results:
Chocolate Chip Cookies (FoCo) 65% > Smoothie (Collis) 35%
Brie and Apple Sandwich (KAF) 67% > Chicken Tender Queso (Hop) 33%

It is down to either FoCo’s Chocolate Chip Cookies or King Arthur Flour’s Brie and Apple Sandwich. The cookies have probably been large contributors to many a freshman 15. You were just trying to get some salad, but FoCo makes it so that in order to get to the greens, you have to pass by the oh-so tempting cookies and end up eating dessert while you browse, naturally. The brie and apple sandwich isn’t that much healthier and is another way to carbo-load. It’s time to pick our poison.

Is the choice too difficult? Are you feeling indecisive? Do you dream of a way to have them both? How about trying the two favorites at once by having a chocolate chip cookie grilled cheese sandwich? Apparently some bloggers are a fan of this sweet and salty combo. I remain skeptical.

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New food combinations are all the rage (think the cronut or the recent wonut), and I think it’s time that Dartmouth makes its own unique contribution to the trend. Rather than sandwiching the Brie and apple between a baguette, 2 chocolate chip cookies could be the vehicle for the fruit and cheese combo. The creation does not lend itself to an easily hybridized name, mostly because there are too many ingredients. Brapple choco-chip cookie sandwich? Eh, it needs some work. Can someone try this combo and report back? Regardless, we have stalled long enough – it is time to make the choice!


I have officially run out of things to say about DDS foods for a long time. Or at least until the beginning of May, when I will announce the winner. Once the votes have been tallied, the decision is final. The number one DDS food will begin their reign immediately. Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me all month!